Sunday, January 20, 2008
I Need Some Quick and Learned Advice
I need to know if I am a judgmental hardnosed hateful old fogie who doesn't understand that times have changed, or just a person who wants positive role models for our children. I'm serious; I need to know what you all think.Scenario: Public school teacher, pregnant, unmarried, living with boyfriend with whom she isn't getting along all that well and has no intention of ever marrying, standing before classroom of impressionable students being what all teachers are: a role model and an example.
. . . of. . . what?
The thing is, times really haven't changed; some people have always had trouble keeping it in their pants or keeping it out of their pants, and what people do in the privacy of their own homes is nobody else's business as long as they're not hurting or betraying someone else.
But. . . shouldn't certain professions hold people to a higher standard than others? We are disgusted when ministers have no self-control. A teacher, who is supposed to be a role model and a good example. . . shouldn't he/she be expected to try a little harder to control himself/herself when it comes to situations that can't be kept under cover of one's own household? Is there such a thing as moral standards these days? Am I confusing my own moral standards with somebody else's moral standards in some kind of awful old-person "nice girls don't do that" kind of way? Because, when I think of an unmarried largely pregnant woman professing to be some kind of positive example in a classroom, in front of young people who are quick to figure out the difference between what we say, what we do, and what we are, I feel heartsick.
Older students ask questions about our lives. What will they do with the answers this woman gives them? Run out and do likewise? What about her credibility in other subjects? If she tells a student to control herself for any reason, will she be laughed at?
Because I really don't think pre-teens and teens are going to dig deep into their shallow pool of wisdom to come up with "How inspiring that Miss Smith, even though knocked up and single, acknowledges that people make mistakes, and is going to shoulder her load of responsibility!"
Aren't older students going to see that their unmarried teacher is obviously letting someone HIT THAT, without any kind of protection? Even if we tell them that it's none of their business, which it isn't, students are going to focus on the fact that Miss Smith is throwing her legs up for her boyfriend so why can't they? MISS SMITH is doing it; doesn't that make it okay for us to do it, too?
Seriously, I really need to know what you think. I've never considered myself to be so conservative that other people's non-hurting-others business would bother me, but this one really does. It really, really does, and I guess I need to know if it really, really should.
Over on the teacher forum, where I am the resident mean teacher, most of them think a pregnant single teacher is just fine. Maybe it's just me. I need to know. If I need a reality slap, please do it.
Help. I need somebody. Help. Not just anybody. Help. You know I need someone. HELP!
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