Sunday, November 18, 2007

Betcher Bottom Dollar

Last July, we drove over two hundred miles to bring the new Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows book to my three beautiful occasionally-borrowed children; Ft. Wayne was the sort-of-half-way point between my home and their home in Michigan, and I am the official supplier of all things Harry Potter in the family. It was a long way to go to sit at Bob Evans for an hour, but it was worth it because, you know, their FACES.
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So it should not come as all that much of a surprise that, as we were willing to drive that far to deliver a book, we would be willing to drive even farther to see one of the beautiful occasionally-borrowed children in her school play.

She was the star. And as the star, she sparkled and shone and projected so beautifully, I'm sure people in the audience were making wishes on her. No Annie before her has ever knocked over a large potted tree on stage made "Tomorrow" seem so bright. She was fantastic.

It was eight hours up on Saturday and nine hours back the next day, but it was worth it. There really isn't much I WOULDN'T do for her. I mean, short of shooting a man in Reno just to watch him die. . . .

It took longer to get back home because we stopped at a discount outlet. My sweet MIL tried to use the Bonworth gift certificate we gave her last Christmas and was told it had expired. This verdict was not acceptable to me and I let the manager know my opinion in no uncertain terms, whilst remaining ladylike to the nth degree. Eventually, MIL was allowed to use her gift card.

Sheesh, not even a year old and already EXPIRED? I don't THINK so, Bonworth. I know that's how a lot of stores make their money but it's not going to happen with MY other mother.

So this Christmas we will not be patronizing this store; I don't think any of you should, either.

All my life it has perplexed me that when these things happen to me personally, I accept it as my lot in life and slink out, head low, murmuring about how life might be for me ". . . if I only had da noive" and wishing I had balls, but when someone else is being bullied, I am able to belly right up to the bar and give the perpetrator what-for because by GOLLY, no one is going to push someone I love around like that.

Also, I now have new socks. Some of them are not black or white. That is because I am a fashion plate - a regular color wheel of innovation and style.

And, I've been sick since last Tuesday, have lost my voice completely, feel as though my energy is being sucked out by gigantic mutated leeches, am expecting 15 people for dinner on Thursday, and am sitting in a messy house knowing I can't go to work on Monday and Tuesday AND clean it up for the appraiser who will be walking through it day after tomorrow making copious notes about dust bunnies and wondering what the woodwork looks like behind the piles of old magazines.

I should have cleaned over the weekend but I weighed my options and picked "Annie." And I'd do it again.

Don't worry, Tumorless; everything will be ready for Thanksgiving Dinner. Bring it on.

So, how was YOUR weekend?


Mamacita, Scheiss Weekly