Thursday, January 25, 2007

I Cut Off Their Balls But They're Doing It Anyway

The new Carnival of Education is up; everybody click on over there NOW. If we don't keep up with the issues, we forfeit our right to whine about the issues. Intelligently, anyway.

I have not been able to comment on any Typepad blogs for a few weeks now. What's up with that? I can read the blogs, and I can call up the comments, and I can type in a comment, but when I click on "post comment" the page just loads and loads and loads and finally times out. Just on Typepad.

Must I start hating Typepad now? Typepad seems to hate me.

After class today, I stopped at the grocery store (Jay-C Plus, and milk is on sale for $1.99/gal.) and bought a few things, among them a 20-pound bag of ElCheapo Cat Fud. (That's only funny if you know your Far Side. . . .) The lady who was bagging my groceries filled a cart with annoying little plastic bags with those hole-handles that break every time you touch them, and topped it off by dropping the bag of cat fud on top of it all.

When I got home, I backed up to the deck and unloaded the groceries (sorry about the deep ruts in that soft ground) drove into the garage and parked, came up the stairs, brought in the groceries (fighting off the cats every second) and came in here to blog. I forgot all about the bag of cat fud out on the deck.

When I finally remembered it, the cats had already torn it open and were sampling its fuddy goodness. I brought the bag inside, and immediately noticed a foul stench permeating the kitchen.

The ~~damn cats~~ hungry kitties had not only torn a hole in the bag, they had, shall we say, staked their claim on it in no uncertain terms.

I really thought that cutting off their balls would put an end to such antics, but apparently not. I'd like to punish them for doing it, but what can I do to them that's worse than cutting off their balls? That can only be done once, you know.

Little Friskies: how come your dog food is on sale all the time but your cat food remains constant at $10.99? I call species discrimination. Can I get any freebies for blowing the whistle here? I really do feel lightheaded and ill, thinking about the price difference of over five dollars. My cat's self-esteem is suffering, too. Honestly, I feel I deserve some big bucks for pain and suffering. If the old woman can hustle money from McDonald's because she put hot coffee between her thighs and squeezed and was shocked at the heat, surely my cat's self esteem is worth something comparable. Besides, my cat is only extremely stupid; he's not a moron who would deliberately place a hot liquid near a sensitive spot and squeeze. And I really don't care HOW hot the coffee was; she's an idiot and the courtroom that gave her money for it is an idiot, too. Smart people don't put boiling liquids near their nether parts, or any other parts. If she got blisters, it's because she put them there herself with her stupididity. (I love Radarisms!)

My kitchen stinks now. I blame the designers of the Cat Fud bag for making it an attractive nuisance and practically forcing the cats to pee on it. That I left it out on the deck is a moot point. It's not my fault. I want money.

The temperature is supposed to fall into the teens tonight. What, is it winter or something?

Back to work for me.

After I spray a little Glade around the house. Peee-yew.

P.S.