Friday, November 03, 2006

I'm not a cannibal, but I'm having some people for dinner tomorrow night.

I'm having people over for dinner tomorrow night, and I want everything to be just right.

That is why I'm on a cleaning binge. By this, I mean that I have run the sweeper and will probably do it again in the morning. It also means that I have gathered up all the textbooks and staplers and stacks of essays and quizzes that normally live on the east side of the dining room table, and moved them into the master bedroom where I will add them to the stacks of clutter I moved in there the last time we had company.

I will then clear the past year's worth of junk mail off the big bar and throw it all away without so much as a backward glance at it. I will hide the large can of vegetable shortening under the sink, as it will not fit into any of the pantry shelves where actual food is kept.

Since all the potatoes in the house are now cooking atop my stove as I type, I will move the boxes of crackers from the top of the pantry cabinet where they block the little tin Victorian boxes that look like stores, into the bin where the potatoes usually live, when we have potatoes. Which we don't, as of tonight. Uncooked, that is. The little Tin Victorian boxes came free with a proof-of-purchase of Nestle Chocolate Chips, back when you didn't have to send postage along with it. Those were the days.

Then I will fit already-used-several-times tall pre-dripped candles into three Oliver Winery bottles and make a centerpiece out of it.

I will also clean the toilet in the big bathroom, and pick up all the "Stone Soup" books that are all over the floor in there. Oh, and I'll put out some two-ply toilet paper bathroom tissue.

When the potatoes are done, I will drain them and add white sauce wherein I have melted all the tag ends of cheese in the house. My "old rotten potatoes" never taste the same way twice, but they are usually pretty good. Then I'll clear out all those expired yogurt cartons from the refrigerator and put the casserole in there 'till tomorrow.

In the morning, I'll slice the pork tenderloin into little round coins and put them in the crockpot with some onions and a bottle of BBQ sauce.

Around four, I'll start the green beans. This is southern Indiana, and we like them borderline mushy and rank with bacon.

Once those are on, I'll mix up the bread dough. An hour later, I'll make it into rolls. At 5:45, I'll put them in the oven. By the time the first payload of guests get here, round one of our dinner will be ready.

Since not everyone can be here at the same time, I'll put another batch of rolls in the oven around 8:00.

The two pies are in the oven right now.

Oh, and I need to root around in the linen closet and find my pretty cloth napkins.

I do so love to have company for dinner. I love the preparation and the fun and all of it.

By the way, I use cloth napkins for company because when we don't have company, I use paper towels from Big Lots, but a company dinner requires too many paper towels, and too many paper towels makes for more bagged trash. We live out in the country, and we have to take our bagged trash to the landfill ourselves. It's easier just to use cloth, and throw them in the laundry later I am elegant by nature.

Everyone who is coming over tomorrow night is a blogger, so if you're anywhere in the neighborhood, please come on over for dinner. There will be plenty, and I'd love to see you.

I'm serious. Email me and I'll give you directions to the house.