Saturday, August 19, 2006

I would like, if I may, to take you on a strange journey.

"Great Scott!"

I watched one of my favorite cult films last night. I hadn't seen it in a long time, but last night? It was time again. It may come as a bit of a surprise to some of you, or maybe not, that when I was younger, I not only used to go to the midnight showing of this film at least once a month, but also that I went as the Domestic. I went with a deck of cards, a newspaper, a water gun, a baggie of rice, a party hat, a garter, and a noisemaker. I owned fishnet stockings. I still know every song by heart. I used to do the Time Warp. Years later, I used to teach my study hall students how to do the time warp.

"Hot patootie, bless my soul! I really love that rock n' roll!"

It's a dreadful movie, really. Silly, soft-pornish, ridiculous, terrible acting, stilted dancing, camp at its best worst. . . . And yet, for some reason, it's endeared itself to many people in spite of it all. I still love it.

"It's not easy having a good time! Even smiling makes my face ache!"

Susan Sarandon. Barry Bostwick. Tim Curry (when he was HOT) (He was still kind of hot in that horrid movie version of "Annie") (I loathe movie versions of good stage musicals; they always leave out the best songs and add stupid songs and even change the plotline). Richard O'Brien (who wrote it in the first place) (In "Ever After," he was the evil man who purchased Drew Barrymore from Anjelica Huston). Patricia Quinn. Nell Campbell. MEAT LOAF (the man can sing, people.) The two old guys. All those ridiculous dancers. Peter Hinwood, who played Rocky, and who, they say, is so mortified by his participation in this movie that he can't even talk about it.

"If only we were amongst friends... or sane persons!"

In context, the whole thing is so absurd it's, well, absurd. Taken out of context, some of the music is really good. This song, most of which was deleted from both the American and the British versions of the film, still has the power to make me pensive.

I've done a lot, God knows I've tried
To find the truth, I've even lied
But all I know is down inside
I'm bleeding.

And Super Heroes come to feast
To taste the flesh not yet deceased
And all I know is still the beast
is feeding.

And crawling on the planet's face
Some insects called the human race
Lost in time, and lost in space
And meaning.

This is not a movie for children; perish the thought. But it's a fun romp for adults. Learn to participate; it's fun. Don't forget the party hats.

Of course, if you don't have time to watch an entire movie, you can always check out the bunnies.