Monday, August 08, 2005

Honore' was an old perv. And when did underoos become uncool?

When my kids were little, they wore whatever I put on them.

Even after they started to school, they were both surprisingly oblivious to fashion, which was good because we had absolutely no money with which to indulge any kind of fashion whim.

It wasn't till upper elementary that they started looking around and noticing what the other kids were wearing, comparing it to their own funky disjointed outfits, and demanding a change.

So we changed. It was years ago and kid fashion wasn't THAT big a deal, and most of it was decent. As long as they had the big hair, they looked goooood. It was the eighties. You could combine all sorts of things and get an outfit.

(REO Speedwagon hair for the boys, and bimbo-cheerleader-gravity-defying-pre-Something About Mary bangs for the girls. I remember those days.)

Now, things are different, espeically for the little girls. Have you looked closely at the little girls' department lately? It looks like a training school for prostitutes Britney Spears wannabees.

Lingerie, size 6x, with a 'back to school' sign on it.

When did 'toy' lipstick become bright red and start lasting all day? Why would a six-year-old child need to carry a purse to school? Why is there makeup in it? Why does she know how to use it?

There are clothes in the little girls' department that nobody would buy except Brooke Shields' mother in "Pretty Baby." Except. . . somebody's mother IS buying them, and probably thinking "doesn't she look pretty" in them.

Picture poor sleazed-up exploited JonBenet. That little girl breaks my heart.

Tiny little girls, wearing makeup and boobless versions of adult slinkwear. What kind of mother dresses her child like a bimbo?

Because that's what these little girls look like, you know, when their mothers layer them oh-so-carefully in slinky satin underwear, croptops, hiphuggers (before they even have hips!) skirts that barely cover the subject, fishnet stockings, and HEELS. On a little child who has RECESS to deal with!

(I see London, I see France. . . .remember when the playground was the only place you could hear that?)

What is going through these mothers' minds when they buy this sexy stuff for a seven-year-old child? Why don't more schools forbid it? I don't believe in censorship but clothing a little girl in Victoria's Secret and sleaze is NOT right.

Come on, people. Please don't send your tiny little girl to school in clothes that advertise something she doesn't even know about yet. Dress her like a child, not a whorehouse intern.

Hooker with a Dora lunchbox. What's wrong with this picture?

Now. Ask me what I think about beauty pageants for little children. Because they tell us more about the poor little kid's mother than about anything else, don't they.

Bring it on, mamas.

Bonus points if you know why Honore' is an old perv.